Almost a decade ago, in 2016, I deliberately began stepping back from social media, especially Facebook. Although I still use it occasionally, it is no longer a visible or active part of my daily life.
It was not an impulsive decision, nor a dramatic rejection of the digital world. It was a quiet understanding, born from observation and experience, that not everything needs to be shared, explained, or seen.
Late recently, one of my students once asked, why do I keep such a low profile online? The question was innocent, yet it lingered with me. I could have spoken about privacy, or the pressures of constant visibility, but the real answer is simpler and deeper.
Some beauties are better when left untouched.
In our age, the instinct to document and display has become so automatic that we often forget the value of restraint. But I have come to believe that not all thoughts are meant for the timeline, not all experiences are meant for a like, and not all beauty survives exposure. The joy of a quiet morning, the grace of a passing thought, the sanctity of a personal milestone, these lose something when they are filtered, captioned, and projected outward.
Moreover, I have learned that what we share is not always received as we intend. The words we post, the photos we publish, the opinions we express, pass through the lens of others’ perceptions, shaped by their moods, experiences, and assumptions. What is meaningful to us may be misunderstood, misread, or even twisted. That is the nature of the public square. But some things are too delicate for that stage.
Keeping away from social media is, for me, an act of protecting the stillness of certain inner spaces – places where thoughts are raw, relationships are sincere, and self-worth is not measured by engagement metrics. It is not about fear or detachment, but about reverence. Like Bhutan’s unclimbed mountains, like a sacred text never fully spoken, some parts of life are most beautiful when left untouched, unposted, unargued, and unseen.
My Story With Social Media
My social media journey began in 2006 with Hi5, popular during my college days. Over time, Hi5 faded away without me needing to deactivate my account, as platforms like Facebook took over. Looking back, it was fortunate because many users on Hi5 used pseudonyms, making chats feel meaningless. I still remember chatting with a woman 👩 (as her profile claimed) named Tiger Park for almost a year 👀. It was funny yet strange to connect with someone I never met or knew was real but kept taking my private time and space.
As Facebook grew in popularity, I joined like many others, appreciating how it helped me to connect with new people and reconnect with long-lost friends and distant relatives. Nonetheless, I realised that maintaining genuine, meaningful relationships requires presence and depth, qualities that constant online engagement often undermines. I chose to gradually step away from the platform to preserve the authenticity of my connections and my own peace of mind.
Later, WeChat became my primary platform for both personal and professional communication for some time until I found that the constant stream of messages, often mixing personal, professional, and group chats, began to fragment my attention and intrude on moments of quiet reflection. I realised that being always reachable is not the same as being truly connected, and so I chose to step back to reclaim focus, boundaries, and mental clarity.
I also explored Instagram and connected with a few close friends there. However, I deactivated my account within a month because the platform did not enrich my life in a meaningful way.
Subsequently, I joined Twitter, a platform widely used by news agencies, primarily to stay updated with current affairs. However, over time, I noticed that while not all celebrities and political figures behave this way, an increasing number use the platform to create chaos and spread false rumours, driven by power, ego, and a sense of supremacy. This trend made me uncomfortable and led me to distance myself from the platform.
Eventually, I joined LinkedIn after hearing during my PhD that it was an excellent platform for professional networking and connecting with individuals sharing similar career interests. However, the more updates I receive, the more I noticed people publicising their microactions and engaging in self-promotion of ideas, making this platform a bizzarro Facebook – one that I have stepped away from almost a decade ago.
Does this imply I am Off Social Media?
Absolutely not.
In fact, in today’s world, living without social media is nearly impossible. It plays a central role in how we connect, communicate, and stay informed.
However, there are professional, personal, and social reasons that determines my social media usage.
Professionally, reducing screen time helps maintain focus, protects my credibility, and at times, reduces the risk of breaching confidentiality or posting content that could be misinterpreted.
Personally, it supports mental clarity, better time management, and the preservation of privacy.
Socially, it is my way of respecting others by not overwhelming them with content that may be disturbing, divisive, or unhelpful.
What I Post on Social Media
Social media platforms (particularly Facebook) serve as useful tools for revisiting and storing past activities through features such as ‘Stories’ and Memory reminders. The search function also makes it easy to trace one’s personal history on the platform.
For this reason, whenever I reactivate my Facebook account, I primarily use it to share links to videos that I find insightful and beneficial – both personally and professionally. I also upload my vintage photographs, as digital storage devices are prone to damage or loss over time.
However, I have customised my privacy settings so that no one else can view the links I share or the updates I post. This decision has greatly reduced my concern about distracting others with content that may not be relevant or meaningful to them. What I find insightful or valuable is often deeply personal and does not always translate in the same way to others. In fact, I believe that some thoughts, memories, and moments are meant to remain personal and cherished in private rather than shared publicly.
Just because I am connected, for example as Facebook friends, does not necessarily mean every aspect of my life needs to be displayed or broadcast with larger social circle. Because social media has cultivated a culture of visibility, many of us mostly feel obliged to share every experience. But I have come to value quiet reflection over constant sharing publicly. For me, meaningful moments do not need validation through likes or comments – they hold their worth in silence too.
What I do not Post on Social Media
I am not writing to present myself as a person with exceptional social media discipline, but I simply share my personal shift in awareness. Over time I have become increasingly mindful about what I choose not to share online (except my blog where I have my control). While social media offer opportunities to connect, inform, and express, as expressed earlier, I have come to believe that not everything needs to be made visible or public. In fact, some things gain their meaning and depth precisely because they are kept private.
That is why, I do not post personal milestones, family matters, or emotional experiences. These moments belong to an inner circle of people with whom I share genuine connection and for that I do not need any audience. I also refrain from posting opinions that may spark unnecessary conflict or misunderstanding.
Moreover, I avoid posting content for the sake of attention or affirmation. I do not believe every meal, sunset, or thought needs to be recorded or validated by likes. There is beauty in living quietly, in allowing some experiences to remain known only to oneself.
What I do not post is just as intentional as what I do. In an age of oversharing, I find peace in holding back, in creating space for stillness, reflection, and authenticity.